Do you find it difficult to know what to do when the one you love starts drinking in front of your children? Are you a parent of a child who drinks too much or suffers from substance abuse?
I often say to my loving Secret Facebook Community – which is filled with some of the most amazing and courageous women on this planet – you have choices. You don’t need to stick around when they’re making bad choices.
You can ask them to leave the house. If they refuse or they’re too drunk, you can pick up your keys, grab the kids, and head right out the door.
Over the years, I have had some women say to me, “Michelle, it’s not that easy. What if they decide to follow me? What if the kids are busy and don’t want to leave the house?”
And here’s the loving but hard truth I need you to hear:
I had three young kids when I was married to my alcoholic and addicted husband. And I get that it’s not easy. But sometimes this disease requires us to do things that are not easy.
There were moments I had to wake up my baby from a nap and get the older ones out of the house. After we were divorced, there was an evening I had to drive until 3am from another state to rescue my kids from his house because he was drunk and out of control and my kids were scared and hiding in the bathroom.
If you know they will follow you to the car and try to prevent you from leaving, you can call the police. I had to do that three different times. Having the police show up at my house was embarrassing, but it showed addiction that I mean what I say. Take me seriously when I say leave the house or leave me alone.
We HAVE to be willing to teach this disease that we mean business and courageously stand up to addiction.
We can do it. I am cheering you on every minute. You are more courageous than you think.
I hope you found this helpful and will consider joining one of the three programs we offer. I would love to get to know you better inside the Secret Facebook Group filled with hundreds of women just like you (you will receive a private invitation after you join one of the programs).
P.S. Speaking of our Secret Facebook Group, one of the very wise women who is a part of it shared this comment when I asked the group this question: “What do you do when you think your loved one might drink this weekend?”
This is what she wrote:
My new thing to say in general is, “Will you let me know if you’re planning to drink tonight? If so, the kids and I are going to go….(do whatever).” This lets him know that I’m not interested in being around it, that I’m not trying to control his behavior, and that I have a plan in place. Sometimes he will say “I’m fine without it,” which is great. Other times, he drinks and we do something else. Tiring, but more peaceful.
THAT’S BRILLIANT! That takes courage and commitment and I am so proud of her. She has been a member of the Love Over Addiction program for a few months and her growth is amazing!